I did exactly that. It's in the outside paper recycle bin with the lid accidentally open.
Sounds intentional. Manipulative. You want her to see it and get a reaction.
You have a lot of personal growth to focus on.
You are right. As much as I know this is the right path for me, I'm upset that it feels like on her terms, a feeling I've had over the course of our relationship. I closed the bin lid.
Ive just read the solo partner. What a good read. Lowering expectations will help me to understand what I can do for 180. The only thing I didn't like about the book was there wasn't specific advice for the distancer. I took it as, manage anger and expectations, and you'll find the distancer tendencies will diminish.
Today is hard, I'm getting the cold shoulder. Complaints about things I didn't do properly while looking after the kids last night.
This is something I can't get my head around. Some of the complaints are valid, some are not relaistic, others I would never think of, and could never consider. I validate, but always have struggled with what is reasonable and what is not. My approach is to improve on what I'm capable of, validate all her concerns, and not be bothered by the rest.
In 10+ years of M, I tried to do it all, but obviously that was in vain and with resentment.
The communicate less approach is nice, but it's triggering her anxiety. I have to make sure to include validation in my responses as well.
