My conundrum is D2. A few guidelines state overnights at different houses isn't good. I've been going back and forth on this, and seems the best is 5 hours blocks and one 8 hour block a week.
Originally Posted by BL42
Are you suggesting allowing W to have all the overnights for D2? If so, I strongly advise against it. Make sure D2 gets used to sleeping at daddy's too. 50/50, period. (if the laws/courts allow it) Don't settle for less...days and nights.
Josh, did you tell your lawyers it was important for you to have 50% of overnights and they said no?!
Most countries have guidelines, often from mental health experts. Custody and my kids were my goal, so my divorce strategy focused on satisfying them. Per Australia's AAIMHI guidelines--
1) At 3yrs, your overnights seem assumed. Can you delay completing your divorce until then? 2) At 2yrs, a. Do you spend time with your kids 50% now such that you would be considered one of the "primary caregivers"? Could you spend more time with your D2 over the next few months to become one? b. If no, the criteria for a "secondary caregiver" to have overnights is that they're able to i. soothe their child and ii. communicate well with the primary caregiver. Could you work towards these?
Watching a 2-year-old is both amazing and exhausting. If it's not for you, I understand stepping aside.
