I get it. It is best to wait, for the kids, and the decision to look for another agent does that. I would have never thought to say this doesnt work for me. In fact, I've probably never in my life said that. I'm going to remember that line. In your scenario, let's say I did say that. And she responds with what do you think, or I don't know what to do? I say "do what's best for the kids?" [quote=Josh_T] LH19, yes, we have a toxic co-dependent relationship, and while I'm trying my hardest to fix, let's assume she won't. I base that on years of marriage and failed couples counselling.
Yeah so it takes two to make a marriage work so this is why it failed.
Originally Posted by Josh_T
Our whole marriage has been trying not to be steam rolled, starting from the first few months we moved in together.
Believe it or not she doesn't want to steamroll you. She wants you to stand up to her. That's why you got the ILYBINILWY. It's her lizard brain. She doesn't trust you can protect her and the family.
Originally Posted by Josh_T
I'm assuming that what I need to survive is the usual detach, validate, set boundaries, and focus on what I want and not to think what her reaction will be.
Yes! Exactly! Based on how you two interact with one another it will be very difficult for you.
