Can you clarify what you mean by weaker position and pretzel self?
The longer you are in IHS the more you will try to placate her which will weaken your position which will allow her to steamroll over you which makes her lose more respect for you. Your natural instinct is going to have the opposite effect. It is almost impossible for someone with anxious attachment to do IHS. Now I am not telling you that you don't have a chance to turn this around what I am saying is it is unlikely to be in IHS. Again she may stay but you will likely just be kicking the can down the road unless you both are 100% into solving the toxic dynamic between the two of you.
Originally Posted by Josh_T
Is that a suggestion that the longer it drags, I'll not be able to have clear separation in the future, that I'll still be in the same dynamic, just living apart? Or you mean emotionally twisted and harder to detach?
No you will eventually detach one way or another unless you choose to stand forever. What I am saying is the IHS will be no picnic for you.
