Did you always feel like the useful appliance/walking cash dispenser, or was this a later aspect of your R?
No - it was pretty much the case the whole time. But again, that's my perception. I try to be careful to not project my own attitudes on the realities of others.
Personally I'm not an advocate of the theory of MLC although there certainly are some examples out there even on this forum of people who have definitely transitioned into some sort of crisis based on past and/or recent trauma. My own xW certainly had both of those factors against her.
One thing that I've learned though is that my life without my xW is better than it was with her, even in the good years. I've also learned post-divorce that it would take a special sort of person to be someone who could actually add to my life rather than decrease my shine. Even though I struggle some times with dealing with everything on my own it's better than having my shine put under a basket.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
