She needs to fully believe that you will not be there for her if she chooses to return, and that if she wants to come back she's going to have to work for it.
You can't tell her that, she'll never believe it. You have to show her that beyond a doubt with your actions.
- Is there any specific action you recommend? - Anything to make this realization faster? - Anything to make this realization more effectively understood?
My constraint is IHS and parenting our special needs child. I am his always-on therapist so need to with him or be at home quite a bit. Still doing plenty of GAL but not meeting / unable to meet new people - is that important in the above context?
Btw, even though I want the MR to be saved, I am unsure if I really care whether she thinks she has a safety net or not.
My thought in your first thread is that you are overthinking things bigly.
The best way for the realization to be understood is for it to be real. The fastest way is for you to start being consistent. And the specific action recommended is the one consistent with your values.
Otherwise you're being someone else and you will be at odds with yourself. She'll know. You'll know. No one will like it.
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
