I'm Back after 1st DB (2)

[BL42]

Josh_T,

For Mothers Day, I'm assuming a card with a picture of the kids and something along the lines of "look at the great thing we did"

A card or small gift the kids can give her is appropriate. Definitely leave out the "look at the great thing we did". Comes across as a manipulation trying to get her to reflect on the good times. Drop any attempt to reminisce which pressures her about the situation. Like LH & SteveLW say...

Take the kids to pick out a gift and card and have the kids sign it. No passive aggressive comments necessary.

For Mother's Day, remember she isn't your mother. smile SO get her a card and gift from the kids. Do not make it about you and her. Make it about her and the kids.

As for the Anniversary...don't acknolewdge on your own. Don't get her anything or plan any dates or prep any emotional pleas. IF she brings it up or gives you something as you're speculating...

Begs the question on reaction when she gives a card. Since she walked away, I'm thinking that I should reject it and state that its inappropriate since you terminated our marriage.

Reject it? No. You don't want to cause friction or come across as harsh. I like LH's take...

Nah accept and thank her and then say “sorry gotta run”

Remember to smile and be cheerful when you say thanks and give her a clever look when you say "I'm heading out". Make her wonder.

Josh_T - It's a balance. You don't want to pursue and pressure and get emotional and plea but you also don't want to be harsh and mean either. Think light, upbeat, cheery...go on like you're happy with life excited to go out and have fun. If you're not there yet then "fake it till you make it" but the goal is to actually feel like that in real life.