Never really got much of a nap. H called me four times while he was finishing up the apartment... While he was driving there, after he finished the last bit of clean up, after he locked the door, and after he turned in the keys. Poor guy needed emotional support, I think.

So I never really got the nap in. I didn't let H know that was the reason why. I finally gave up after BIL2 called, and then just headed to MIL's house--which, I guess now is H's house.

H called me while I was driving. Said that "it was all over with now"--meaing his apartment and that whole female roommate thing. Also wanted to tell me about a game he picked up for us (in a very apologetic voice, since he knows he doesn't have the money). Something we'd been wanting for a long time. Then he went on about this new game that was coming out...felt very much like our normal R. I think we both want that back very badly.

Got to H's house. BIL2 was there, so I invited him to the movie with us. (Yeah! It's back to the three of us hanging out. ) I had forgotten how (unintentionally) intrusive BIL2 is with H. H is really giving up a lot for me, since his privacy is a big issue with him.

H told me xrm had called earlier. (Two days in a row.) That she was really wanting to see him that day. (Which, of course, irked me.) I told H I had a bad feeling about that. He said she had actually asked for direction's to MIL's house (where H is now living). She has been there before, but obviously doesn't remember how to get there. He said he told her that his entire family was there, and it was not a good idea to come by.

Never mind that I am over a lot. It's to that level of comfort where I have a key, and don't even always bother to ask. I am pretty much totally integrated into H's family. And BIL2 can't stand her--met her once, and thought she was incredibly rude.

H said he needed a better reason to tell her next time, but didn't want it to come from him. So I suggested that he tell her that BIL2 didn't want her over at the house (MIL, BIL2, and now H all live in the same house) because he doesn't like her. H said he liked that idea, since it's basically true.

I did tell H she could track down the house if she wanted to--she had the number to the house, and all it takes is a little internet work to get directions. H said she doesn't have internet at her place. I told her all she'd have to do was go to a library. He said she wasn't that smart. (LOL! So I took perverse pleasure in that comment...)

She called again while we were waiting to go to the movie. H came over and whispered in my ear that he thought she was just going stir-crazy because of her sister's baby, and maybe that's why she wanted out of the house. Then he said "but that's her own fault, stupid b!tch." That certainly surprised me... (Did I ever mention that once someone does something, anything he doesn't like, my H is horribly vindictive and usually can't stand that person anymore...?)

While H was getting dressed after his shower, he mentioned he had made dinner plans with xrm. I didn't say anything--sticking to my plan of not harassing him about her. He was basically relaying the conversation. She had wanted to get together, he had said he was busy. He finally suggested a quick dinner before he went to work the next day at some sort of fast food. He asked if that was okay. At first, I thought he meant he was asking her if that was okay, so I was just listening. Then he said he was asking me. (That sure surprised me! He doesn't need my persmission...)

I said it was fine. He said he could tell I was bothered. I agreed that I was, but it was because she had gotten so incredibly weird. He said that's why he wanted to meet her at a fast food place--because it's public. Said he wanted to read her body language, that she had been sounding calm lately, but he didn't trust that. (H is an incredibly suspicious person...doesn't trust anyone...I think he's trying to gauge the situation.) He also said he was going to make a point to cut out quick, say he was busy, had other things to do.

As we left, H got a little uncomfortable outside, looked around, said he felt like he was being watched. I could kind of feel it, too, but I think maybe it was just nerves.

BIL2 dropped us off at the house after the movie, and then went to a friend's. When H went to open the door, it had been open just a crack, and just swung in at his touch. We both kind of looked at each other. I know he was thinking the same thing as me--did we just forget to lock it, or had someone been there?

H insisted I wait outside, then went through the entire house. We went through it again together after that. Then H noticed something he thought he had left on the table wasn't there. Nothing else was disturbed. He looked pretty mad, said there was only one person that he knew who would take just that and touch nothing else. I told I was pretty good at these kinds of things, and nothing else in the house looked moved. We eventually found it, up in his room. Guess we both forgot that he put it there.

Nothing was missing. I think no one remembered to lock the door when we left, since neither H nor I did it. But still, with all the weird stuff going on, it did make me nervous.

H asked me to wait a few minutes, he needed to do something, so he could give me a nice big hug before I left. So I hung out in his room, playing on the SP. It had that nice feel to it--like when we were completely solid, boyfriend and girlfriend, and I used to hang out in his room. I actually really liked it.

I was sitting on the air mattress that MIL uses for the kids. H is going to be getting my bed, and I'm taking his to my new place, so the air mattress is temporary. When he came in, he laid down on me, told me how much he hated giving up his apartment and his own place, something that was his own home. That he was going through all of this stress for me. I told him I knew that, and I really did appreciate it.

Knowing H, his LL is acts of service, going to these kinds of extremes is his way of making up for all the mess of the last few months. The first sep and the PA, this sep, his having a female roommate, and now all the craziness involved with her. This is his way of making it right. He's only moving in with MIL because she lost her job and needs the money--otherwise, he would have tried to get a small studio or something along those lines.

H mentioned xrm again...said he was afraid to totally cut off contact with her, since she had gone so nuts before at that idea. Compared her again to a drug addict, said he was going to try to keep cutting his time with her shorter and shorter. I told him he was doing it to protect me. His face lit up (I think he's feeling guilty about spending time with her at all now) and said that's exactly what he was trying to do--especially since she has a real problem with me. He asked that I let him handle it his way, and I agreed.

When I left, he wanted to know exactly what route I was taking, and for me to call him when I got there or he would come looking for me. (This whole thing must really have him on edge.) I promised I would.

I hate feeling uncomfortable in my own home. I have never been afraid to be alone, because I am a very capable person. But knowing someone specific may be kind of tilted...makes me nervous. I kept looking over my shoulder as I let myself into my dark apartment.

When I went to bed, H called and said he was going to head up soon. (I think he already missed me.) I said okay--and decided to sleep in the buff as a nice surprise.

About 40 minutes or so later (about when he should be getting there) I thought I heard H's voice. I kind of layed there, confused. He had a key, and always let himself in. I thought I heard a male voice, coming from outside of the apartment. The dog had started barking before I heard the voice, so I had assumed it was him.

I grabbed a robe, grabbed a weapon, took my phone, and went into the living room (but didn't turn on a light). I called H to see where he was. He apologized and said he was still at his house. I told him it was okay, I just thought I had heard him. I didn't hear it again, and I didn't check outside. I just went back to bed in my robe. My nerves are playing such tricks on me with all of this stuff...and the lack of sleep didn't help...

H called me in the middle of the night (2am, I think). I was crankier than I have been for a long time. Something about he couldn't find his wallet, and wanted me to look for it. I was incoherent, I kept griping at him in the phone, and I think threatening to hang up. He was wanting me to check my purse. I think at some point I finally did stumble into the other room to look, but I can't recall. I was really bad on the phone, though.

H did eventually come to spend the night with me. ( ) I asked him this morning, and he had just misplaced his wallet. I gave him lots of kisses, and apologized for being such a witch on the phone, that I hadn't realized how mean I was being at the time. He said it was okay, and just wanted lots more kisses.

Not sure how much of this is just crazymaking with roommate, but she's given off enough warning signals to make me paranoid. I halfway expect to see her skulking around my aparment complex when I come home one day. I just have this gut feeling that this is the calm before the storm...

[color:"purple"]Nevanna[/color]