On the way up, H pretty much passed out. We got close to the city, and I remembered H needed to feed his snakes (they are at MIL's house). So I woke him, and asked him if he wanted to stop by there. He said he did.
I had missed my exit because I had asked him too late, so I decided to cut across the country to get to the pet store. I was looking for a certain road--and didn't realize it didn't come out all the way to the road I was on. So I went too far south. Then the next road I turned on, a semi had come down this way and not been able to make the turn. Midwestern backroads can be too narrow, and he was stuck in the mud and blocking the intersection. So I had to make another turn I didn't want. Then, the road I needed to make was shut down for construction.
This is another thing that gets me tense, and I don't know why. I commented to H that I wasn't having any luck, and he said it was no big deal. I think he could tell I was getting a little tense. He told me it was okay, I was fine, we were just a little far south of where we needed to be. I wasn't as uptight as I have gotten in the past, but I need to remind myself to relax more.
After we got to MIL's with the rats, H wandered off to make a phone call. (His obsession with not talking on the phone where anyone can hear.) I mentioned, after he came back in, that I wanted H to step me through how to feed his snakes, since I'll be taking care of them once he goes to basic. He said I should have said something earlier, he had already put the rats in. I said I had only just thought of it.
We watched some TV, waiting on the snakes to eat (it can be slow). H seemed tense. I was playing on the SP, but I paused it and asked him if he was okay. I started massaging on his shoulders. He said he was just tired of the nonsense, and would be glad when it was over. That he hated losing his friend, but he needed to make me happy. I said I knew that, she was important to him, and I appreciated what he as doing. I did slip and ask if they had had sex--I had promised myself I wouldn't, and hadn't for, oh, two days. He said no. I said I only thought that because she was acting like they had been involved somehow.
I'm not sure if roommate brought it up or not, but he mentioned the cats again. How she had wanted to watch them while he is away with the army, but he wouldn't let her. Told her they needed a stable place to stay, she wasn't stable. Said she might move into a place where cats weren't allowed, and what would she do then? The cats can't stay with H's mom--he told her the female cat would get out too easily. She then suggested that she just take the male cat. That got him mad--he's not splitting up the two cats, and told her she had no right to ask for them. He told me she got pretty ticked at him.
He said it was hot in the house, so we moved to talk on the porch. I asked him, again, if he was okay. He must have been ready to talk, because he talked some more. Said he was really afraid that roommate was going to say something to me to make me want to leave. I asked him how she was going to do that, if we never met, and he told me he thought she had my number. (I think he's afraid she's going to say they slept together.)
I told him it didn't matter what she said, whether or not it was true--that I would believe him, regardless. I said I had thought of one of two things--that she would be either lieing completely, or that she was just doing it to get back at him. Either way, she's trying to wedge us apart, and I'm not going to fall for that. H said the weirdest thing, then--that, even if he and roommate had been together, the joke would have been on her, since he didn't love her. Weird comment, but H has always talked in "what-if" and "if-this-had-happened" so I chalked it up (mostly) to his personality.
We checked on the snakes, and they were not done. So we moved to the backyard to talk some more. H said he was terrified that I was going to not want to be with him. (Doesn't this strike anyone as odd?? He left me...) That he was really scared rooomate was going to say something to me that would make me change my mind.
I told him that wasn't possible, that I had pretty much already come up with everything she could say. And, that if I was going to leave, I would have done so after the first sep when he told me about the brief PA. I told him I had babies on the brain--which should go to show him that I wasn't going anywhere, if I was thinking of having kids with him.
H told me he just wanted to start fresh, get out, start us all over again. That he knew he was saying the exact same things as the last time we were seperated, but that he really meant it this time. He said he liked the idea of me maybe going back to school with him. I said I liked the idea, but I hated the thought of starting all over again career-wise. He said it would be great if we could work together, especially since he was going into paleontology.
The snakes were done then, so we headed back to my place to get his car.
