Need advice please. (3)

[BL42]

Dink,

He did say his mom did say to him that the decision was probably a little more her than me but it was mutual.

My daughter and her fiancé stopped over also a little later and we all talked a little. It’s funny I sense they all pretty much know that it was mom who was pushing for this more after talking with her.

Your kids, especially being adults, are definitely going to get to the bottom of the situation. That's just one of the many reasons you don't lie or throw mud...it'll surface anyway.

It was nice to hear them defend me some for basically having to do everything

I understand why that's comforting, but remember she's their mom and they'll be in her life even if she's having an affair, so you'll need to accept that.

say mom is a Huge procrastinator and you pretty much had to do everything. They said She is not good at knowing how to do things and I did say that I was partially my fault by trying to do everything and and trying to make up for the past . And I was honest and said by doing that and kinda like walking on eggshells, that probably didn’t help, and I see that now. She lost maybe respect and atttraction
By being a doormat I told them what I needed to do was balances my new changes with the old me, and it would have been better, but I know at least going forward what I need to do.

Careful not getting into too many details with them, even if you're going along with what they say negatively about her. It's comforting as the LBS to hear, but you don't want to be going on about their mom and your relationship or actions. Just listen and validate their feelings without comment or judgement.

I got a text last night about 7 p.m saying im sorry I forgot to call yo this weekend about coming over to house. I’ve been sick all weekend.
I never responded.

Good job.

So. Today is our 30th anniversary lol.

30 years is a big one. How are you feeling today? Most newbies would be inclined to make a grand gesture on the day. Resist the urge if you have one.

Anyways , She went back to work today after have the spring break week off. She has no sick time left, and will be docked pay for leaving. Anyways.

Her issue now. Try not to spend your time thinking about it.

This morning she texted me. ‘Are you at work” I waited a bit to reply and said yes. She said ok, I am super sick as school and leaving for day. Im going to use bathroom
At house if that's ok. I waited a bit and replied, house is a mess,it's up to you. She replied I went to moms house. I didn't respond.

Sounds like you handle the text messages / house clearing business well.