BL… RE: OLD… I’m not sure what your profile looks like but make sure you have decent pictures (no mirror selfies, no pics of you lying on a bed shirtless…no shirtless pictures period unless you are on a beach, no pictures of you and attractive females). Also…in your written statement about yourself (and please have one…pics only just says “lazy”, my pics should be enough”, or “I’m not really serious about this”) make sure you are really positive in what you say and don’t say things like “no drama please” as that implies your life is filled with drama. If you have good female friends, maybe get them take a look at your profile to see what their reaction would be if they didn’t know you. Also…don’t have a long list of what you are looking for. A woman may read your six criteria and think that she matches five but not six so swipes left, not wanting to set herself up for rejection…especially if you say something about not wanting to settle. Bottom line…you want to appear approachable and friendly, confident but not arrogant, and serious but not too serious. It’s a fine line to walk which is why I would get some female friends to give you some feedback if possible.
Most importantly… if you do reach out to someone, read their profile and make sure you bring up something that they wrote about. Don’t just say “Hey” or “Hi Beautiful. How is your day going?” or something equally generic. Or “your search is over” which is one I got the other day…lol. The person you are contacting wants to know that you read her profile and are reaching out because you saw something unique about her that you liked. I have no problem ignoring the greetings that the other person could have sent to multiple people at the same time but I tend to return the messages that are specific to me unless the other person is a hard no. I used to respond to those as well, to be polite… thank them for reaching out but I didn’t think we would be a match. But then they would want to argue about it or want me to tell them exactly why and I really didn’t want to get into it. So now I just don’t respond to people I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be attracted to. I feel bad about it but I’ve realized it’s just easier.
Glad to hear everything else in your life is going well.
