Thanks LH19. Basically you are saying that I should just let her vent even if a lot of it is very inaccurate. Is there anything I should be explaining to her at all?
Bad behavior: Yelling at her, getting annoyed over 'simple things' (simple according to her), not able to share things with me fearing that I will get annoyed, not satisfying her sexually.
Not able to share is a mutual problem. I could not share much with her about problems because she would either dismiss it or turn it into a fight. She kept detailed notes of fights but my own pain during those fights is not something she thinks is worth considering. She said that to me directly as she is sure that I am the cause of all fights (which is quite inaccurate, although I admit that many fights were because I ran my mouth). Otoh I distinctly remember that she would get really mean and then even though I would try very hard to avoid the fight from escalating she would deliberately come at me again and again and finally break me. I have strong family values but I understand that yelling is not consistent with maintaining a family.
Regarding the D bomb, I am certain that she has not thought about her son at all. She said that she cannot sacrifice her life for him. Her family has got involved and they think similarly. I am devoted to my child otoh. How do I make her be more considerate about our son and the effect of divorce on him?
What should I do about her affair? She has been thinking of living separately - should I object to it?
