NEXT!

[DonH]

Don, I think Ginger has dated someone with BPD and now the ex-heroin addict within the last 6 months. I don't see that this person was actively using 6 months ago, am I reading this correctly?

If this is true I apologize. I thought he was only clean for 6 months. If it’s 6 years it can be a very different story. If 40 years, I mean, c’mon. Relationships have risk. Anything can happen to anyone.
Someone can develop a new addiction. They can receive a devastating diagnosis like in KMLs case. They can receive a head injury and drastically change their personality. If we are going to eliminated people for something 25 years ago we are going to eliminate a whole lot of people. Who will be left? We need to be reasonable.

The very best predictor of future behavior is their recent, relevant past behavior. What has gone on in the last 5 years is likely to continue. If the last 5 years have included active addiction that is likely to continue. The same goes for sobriety. Likewise I would not be nearly as harsh on this guys mother if he’s been sober for 10 years. It was the recentness of it all that set me off on mom.

Bottom line, no one is going to be perfect and without risk. If we eliminate everyone for anything in the past 40 years we are going to be alone. No one is without baggage or risk. It’s how they have dealt with it in recent years that means the most - and that includes addiction.