Well one thing I really would like (and haven’t really had) is someone who has their act together financially, at least enough not to be a drag on my own retirement. I don’t need a guy to have a lot of money, but I need him to be able to pay his own bills in retirement and live within his means. I have enough for me but not enough for someone else too in retirement (beyond offering housing).
This reminds me of a conversation I had over the weekend with "K" ... another of our nebulous is this or isn't this a date evenings. He is of the opinion that a lot of women over 40 are looking at guys in their 50s as a meal ticket - not about love, definitely about what does the guy bring to the table in terms of housing, $$, job/career, etc.
I countered that so many of my female friends are not looking for that at all - in fact, quite the opposite - happy to date, have sleepovers, but are def. not into sharing finances, or even living together. Don H's "living together apart" was quoted. This conversation went on for a while as it really was about an overarching theme of what dating is like now, vs in our 20s when it was about attraction/infatuation/love.
I wonder if part of the problem is that if you're single at this age, you might have had your world blown up by a divorce that you still haven't financially recovered from ... whether you're male or female.
baggage - we all have it, some more than others.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
