Would you expose an affair of your S? Did you or Didn’t u not when it happened? Would you explain to people/family the reason nonsense coming out of XS?
Should you villainize your spouse? Sure, if you don't share kids and are confident you want a permanent split! You good. They villain. Your friends will pick up on this social cue that you're seeking support moving on.
Otherwise? You're creating a wedge that makes reconciliation harder and makes staying together harder even if reconciliation is achieved. I have personal experiences with that--involving abuse, not cheating. Think of it this way. Your friends and family won't encourage and will discourage you staying with someone likely to hurt you again.
