Things are going pretty good for me. How about you? I usually take the weekends off from here. I posted my e-mail address earlier on this thread. Feel free to write me. If you can't find it, let me know, and I will post it again. I check my mail pretty regularly.
Quote: You have a lot of insight into your sitch!
I realized that I had always known everything I needed to about my H, just wasn't using it effectively. I just took the time to really figure out how to put those pieces together.
Quote: I'll have to read more about your panic attacks. How did you get over them?
Not very well!! LOL I've always had them. The first one I can remember, I must have been 12 or 13. They're always social interactions that get me. A solo playing test in middle school band...five year high school reunion (that one actually happened before the event, and drove my H up a wall)...going out dancing at a bar...
I have found the best way to not have them, is to decide going into whatever situation that I'm going to be fine, I'm going to have a blast, and screw everyone else. They're hard to control once they start. The other trick, for me at least, is to not just give into it. I used to let it take over, and would hide in a bathroom or just leave, and wound up crying for hours. No joking. And then, after I calmed down, would just berate myself for letting something so silly get to me.
But, seriously, the times I have decided that, absolutely positively, I was going to have a great time--I have. I think that it's just a bad habit that I can get out of...sort of like getting into a different lane on the interstate, so therefore my destination is different. And the panic attacks have been less frequent. I absolutely refuse to take any medication for it. I also think too much sugar, for me, might be related...but that's so hard to prove.
Quote: How do you not pursue??? I see that you KNOW that it works for you, so you just DO it!
Oh man, I was the queen of pursuing until this seperation. There are times I pick up the phone, then put it down. And pick it up, and put it down. I have done this dozens and dozens of times. I keep telling myself that, as much I keep thinking it will make me feel better--it's really only going to make things worse! That's what really stops me, on my bad days.
The other thing I have learned--it's all about distractions. I literally try to think about something else when I'm really stuck. Something, anything--cute puppies or going to the tanning bed. Or I go and do something else...go shopping, go work out, play a video game. Anything. It's certainly not easy!
Anyway, feel free to e-mail me. Have a good day! And believe me, I understand about not having any patience...I fight with mine every day!
If you can't find it, let me know, and I will post it again. I check my mail pretty regularly.
