Hmmm. AK we occasionally get LBSs here that insist that they are closers to their WAS' family than the WAS is. And maybe it is true occasionally. But I think you need to tread lightly here. She is YOUR MIL. She is his MOTHER. Blood tends to be thicker than water. My fear here is that you are trying to keep your MIL as an ally in all of this, as a way to get your husband back. I know you insist her visit isn't about that. But let me ask you, how often has your MIL come for a visit like this in the past? Is this usual or unusual?
AK, the other fear I have is that eventually, your son apart, she is going to pull away from you. It is the natural order of the world. Are you ready for that to happen? I am concerned that you might get hurt by that eventually.
Just proceed with caution. As upset as she might be with her son's behavior, he is still her son.
Thanks SteveLW for your concern. I understand how this may look like and I am also aware that things may change as people change. Even before the separation, we have lots in common, we like the similar sense of humor. We would hike, hang out or go shopping together and when we are apart we chat and video call constantly. All without necessarily having H around. I don't know whether it is because she's an only child and was very close to her Mum so she missed that female-bonding time as she only has a son in my H. I also don't know how to explain it nor do I know whether this will change, as we do not have control over people's feelings anyway. For all I know, my own mum could suddenly disown me when I divorce or something, regardless of blood relation. I understand as well not everyone might have the same relationship with their MIL, but in my case we are just close.
In terms of visits, my MIL visits us (or us visit her) quite often. She visits on most holidays and Christmases. Her visit now is a part of the plan to have my 'village' ready for the birth as my H is most probably not going to be there. When I was 36w pregnant with my son and H had to be away to the states she also flew from the UK to be with me for few weeks, so waiting on me being pregnant and ready to burst is not something new for her.
