You don't have to sign a big retainer or engage formally yet, but at least get a free session outlining your rights to get a better sense on where you stand. That knowledge will help inform where you go with an amicable/uncontested divorce, should it go that way.
DO NOT tell your W you had a consultation, keep that to yourself. No need to tip her off or get her defensive or riled up.
Three main areas to consider: 1) Custody/Support - With no minor children custody and child support are a non-issue. 2) Spousal Maintenance - Sound like you were married for two decades or more? Not sure how much either of you make relative to each other, but this could be in play. 3) Assets - With multiple houses and I'm assuming some savings and retirement accounts this could be an area of negotiation.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
