What I meant about the 2nd time in 3 years was we told the kids three years ago we were getting a divorce, she told me she want one then when she was in a emotional affair and I found out. When we talked to the kids it was a bitch but I let her do most the talking which on the ride home together she was pissed about because she said it made her look like the bad guy the one to blame And it was may long ago affair that caused this. We about 4 months later got back together and when we bought the lake house and we have been living there since as a new start because of the Bad memories so to speak at other house from the years past. And as I have said previously the last 3 years of been a huge improvement in our marriage but still with the resentment at time showing some up sometimes. So again im the one who didn’t want the divorce and she feels again like she is going to come across as the bad guy again and the bothers her. I was more accepting this time but still have to say I was way more blindside this time since our relationship, time spent together and connection was so much better and loving . At least I thought.
