#20 - Still working through Ring & Piecing

[SteveLW]

I think there are several answers. Sandi's posts taught me alot about life, women, why people do things. Lots of street smarts to gain.

I also think it gave me false hope. If I follow DB and Sandi to the T, my marriage can be saved.
While I think everything happened as it should've and I'm incredibly lucky the D happened exactly when it did for reasons that would too much reveal some anonymity; I could've done without the false hope.

BUT, LH, Steve, vets warned me of that. Couldn't listen at the time. Did not compute.

Core, don't be too hard on yourself in that regard. Most of us come here looking for THE thing to say or do to make our WASs change their minds. I think it takes us as LBSs a while to come to grips to the idea that there is nothing we can do, it is out of our control. We can DB to give ourselves the best chance at that outcome, but it ultimately comes down to whether or not the WAS WANTS to change their mind.

So we all struggled with that. sandi's insights into why a WW did and said what they did and said sure was helpful, but you are right, it was no guarantee of saving the MR. I still argue for LBHs with a WW that sandi's insights give you the best chance of saving your MR, but still no guarantee.