And Ginger1 I think you might be missing the point on the Catholic Faith. As a matter of fact every single member of the church is a sinner. At least I sure hope so.
Because otherwise, the faith is complete hogwash. The whole idea is that none of us are perfect enough to make it to heaven. We're not close. That's why we needed a savior. Because we need to be saved. We're all really screwed up.
But hopefully we strive to be better, whatever that might look like for each of us. But along the way, what a mess. And again, ironically, if it weren't for the mess, the whole thing wouldn't make sense. We'd be able to do it on our own.
And the institution is massive man run institution - and therefore flawed, like all of them are.
I'm sorry that you've had a bad experience with it.
But for me - this being my little corner of the world - I'm working through the annulment process because for me its healing and healthy and for me, I would like to have the option to get married again inside the church.
It's wild how upsetting that seems to be to others. Really strange to me.
I'm working through the annulment process because for me its healing and healthy and for me, I would like to have the option to get married again inside the church.
Makes a lot of sense, especially the healing and healthy part - best of luck w/the process.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
I respect your religious beliefs (and any other religious beliefs practiced here.) I hope you received my messages about the annulment as curious and neither upset nor disrespectful.
Originally Posted by Scott
So, if your marriage ended, it could not have been a marriage by that definition - at least that's how I think of it.
This message is what sparked my curiosity! If the marriage is wiped away the kids would become illegitimate and sex would become premarital. It's a quirk. Like the Mormon's founder being a polygamist but polygamy now being banned in that church.
Originally Posted by Canon Law 1061
An invalid marriage is called putative if at least one party celebrated it in good faith
Originally Posted by Canon Law 1137
The children conceived or born of a valid or putative marriage are legitimate.
The Catholic Canon law on annulments is interesting--it doesn't seem to completely wipe away the religious marriage in your case, they downgrade it from "valid" to "invalid, putative" to still afford some protections to you, your XW, and your children vs. wiping it out.
Traveler - I appreciate you actually reading up on the subject. You now know more than 99% of Catholics. And I completely agree with you that its complex and nuanced.
The first passage I found, in a book that was recommended here, was 1 Corinthians 7:15 that gave me peace.
This was in a Dobson book called "Love Must Be Tough". In it he talks about letting a spouse walk if they walk and knowing you can have / will have peace. That was actually big for me. It helped me to let go.
Last edited by job; 03/31/2201:49 PM. Reason: added link to new thread
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
