Core - Still Alive #7?

[Core]

As for the anxiety - natural treatments that may help include 5-htp (especially if you have any OCD tendencies) SAMe, B complex vitamins, exercise, sunshine, and vitamin D. My anxious patients do best if they turn off the news - I tell them I’ll do the worrying for both of us. Get out in nature, and try meditation or Tai Chi or the Calm app on your phone - mindfulness helps.

Some good tips there. I know my source of anxiety and its not CNNs lies or Foxs corporate news. The simplest way to put it is that I want to take action in a peaceful way yet I'm in no position to with kids so young and an Ex and justice system that'll scoop my kids up in a moment. Meals on wheels, helping the homeless, all great things. Just for me its feminine energy and I get enough of that as a divorced parent. Masculine energy would be to do something like expose the corruption at the top of society which would have monumental benefits for society for a generation or two until it seeps back in. Not saying that's what I want to do, just an example.

So making a great difference in the life of some individuals that maybe they decide they want to live another day because you helped out isn’t worth it because the negative outweighs it to you? Because you as one person can’t overhaul the world, it’s not worth making a few individual lives more livable?

You are beyond depressed my friend. And I am guessing you had a bad experience with an anti-depressant. But I can’t see how not trying a new one can put weight the heavy depression and doom and gloom you are immersed in.

You have kids. Something bigger than you. Something bigger than the government. Your kids. There is no way this isn’t leaking over to them.

Start small. Rome wasn’t built in a day, was it? I really hope you find a way to start digging yourself out, even if for your kids sake. You deserve it too .

Thank you Ginger for stopping by. Been awhile.

In all reality, no I don't believe feeding the homeless or something of the like will be worth it, for them or me. Most people are one or two paychecks away from being in the same boat. Stemming the problems causing homelessness to continue and to grow beyond population growth is a challenge I'd rather take on than feeding someone for a day.

Is what I wrote depressing, yes. Is it depression, I'm not sure. To me, I just see reality and very few around me do. The problems in todays society are the same as have always been. Not left and right, but rather corrupt elite trying to control the serfs. They take the money, they distract us with problems, they help us solve some they made up, and everyone at the bottom claws each other over our tiny scraps. The problems now however target kids often and now I'm being pulled in to this whether I want to or not. I dont like sex ed in kindergarten. I dont like race based school curriculum which are occurring where I am. My daughter one day at the store saw someone and said "hi X skin color lady". I asked her where she heard that and was told it was "skin color day at school". Guess who looks like the bad guy, the teacher or the guy whose kid is pointing out others with different skin color. Look how my kid now sees someone as different than them, one of the things I tried to prevent. At 5. On top of this, my x who see her race as above and better than others, loves the curriculum so any chance of finding a normal school, means another expensive battle which wont happen because I cant afford it. I'd rather try to help my 5yo than spend $ and time on adults. Selfish yes, is it my job to protect my kids from mental, emotional and physical abuse, yes. But what a waste of time and money it is, when the school could just be normal. Like teaching sex ed and skin color in kindergarten will make a utopia? It's all a designed distraction and now innocent kids are roped in.

I feel like most people have to know something bad is on the horizon. Do others not see it or feel it coming? There's going to be a lot more homeless in the near future. I don't know anyone in the US thats under 65 and over 25 that would call themselves happy currently. Youth have raging hormones and distractions, those older dont worry as much of the future but everyone in the middle seems at edge, and unhappy. I can get by in a day and have fun with the kids and have some happiness with them. I think seeing and preparing for the times ahead is less impactful than what the schools are doing or what the consequences of the west collapsing is going to cause.