Ann, please remember that your situation is YOUR situation. Not ours. So while you might get some 2x4s and you might get some advice contrary to what you want to do, you shouldn't take that personally. We all are here just trying to help LBSs tread the waters of their situation with an objective perspective or perspectives to help them. So while the forum might tell you that you should do A, it is still in your power to do B. We see a lot of LBSs that struggle with this and think they are doing "wrong" when they go against the advice. There is no right or wrong in how you approach your H, there is simply things that the collective here have seen work better than other approaches.
Thank you for this reminder, SteveLW. I understand this and I do find it valuable to get a different perspective from people who have actually been in similar situations. I have been able to at least weigh in the pros and cons that I would otherwise not realise. I really appreciate the advice, but yes, if I do end up doing something different it would be because it was probably what I think was best at that time.
Originally Posted by SteveLW
Remember, you cannot nice him back to the MR. Commanding respect is paramount to being nice.
I really need to practice this better. I sometimes fear that if I push him away too much he will end up resenting me, and as we are probably looking at the potential of co-parenting for a while, I would prefer him to be cooperative.
