A bit of an update. After saying I am going to go to do the test when it suits me no matter what, H insisted that he drives me there and stays with me.
Well you have final say if you want him to take him or not.
Originally Posted by AnnKay
I think this is another control aspect as when he thinks he is losing control with me not relying on him he feels he has no reason to give in.
Maybe. Or maybe he is trying to do the right thing as the father of the baby.
Originally Posted by AnnKay
Another thing I have told H is to stop love bombing via text in a clearer "your actions speak louder than words. It is confusing for me when you say things via text yet you are staying with someone else. I do not think this should continue." He did not say much after this.
Ok Ann this is a form of control on your part. Husband is free to text you what he wants unless you block him. Otherwise you just ignore it.
Originally Posted by AnnKay
Today, after he picked up our son he sat down with me saying how he wants to comfort me. He hugged me tightly, kissed my hands and stroke my pregnant belly. I was not sure how to deal with it that I just distracted him or tried to get away from him and dealt with my son. I know this might be the hormones, but I did feel vulnerable and it makes me want more attention and affection. I also cannot say I don't like it, but I am not entirely sure how to think of this.
Well you need to sit with this and dig deep if you are comfortable with him doing it.
Originally Posted by AnnKay
I told him as he was leaving home that it confuses and hurts me that he does this and he just said sorry.
Ok so what are your boundaries to ensure he doesn't hurt and confuse you again?
Originally Posted by AnnKay
I am no longer as angry with him as before so is it really that bad that sometimes I get some comfort from him?
That's up to you. What are your expectations? When they are not met will it send you spinning?
Originally Posted by AnnKay
I understand his decision, and it feels like I am doing that for my own comfort and not to make him come back.
I think you may have to sit with this one for a bit. Your exact words are that you want the attention and affection although it confuses and hurts you. You are not being congruent with your words.
Your situation is very difficult Ann. I am not going to lie you have a really long road ahead and the quicker that you detach the easier it will be for you and the baby.
