Hooray! I never understood why people would celebrate a divorce, until my fairly simple and not too contentious divorce took two years. I was just so glad to be done with all the paperwork and move on!!! I wanted to throw a party and drink margaritas!
Thank you. Had you told me 3 years ago that I'd one day celebrate this I would have said absolutely no way. I get it now.
I'm not one to celebrate divorce, but also know your now ExH has taken ridiculous actions to fight you on it...despite living with OW for several years. Enjoy the peace of mind finally closing out the the process and putting it behind you will bring.
I posted this last night and then worried that I'd offend someone. 3 years ago I was devastated, broken, shattered and wanted to die.
3 years, 11 court dates and $15k in legal fees later I was so tired. I feel like I've been through the wringer. I limped across the finish line battered and bruised but I made it so yes I wanted to celebrate surviving.
I posted this last night and then worried that I'd offend someone. 3 years ago I was devastated, broken, shattered and wanted to die.
Don't worry about offending me - just meant I understand it in your case. It was incredible to me how he was living with OW for years yet at the same time fighting you tooth and tail against a D.
Originally Posted by kas99
3 years, 11 court dates and $15k in legal fees later I was so tired. I feel like I've been through the wringer. I limped across the finish line battered and bruised but I made it so yes I wanted to celebrate surviving.
ExH (notice what I stressed) certainly put you through the ringer. Hope this milestone helps bring you some peace of mind and closure.
Me:39 Ex-W:37 M:7 T: 9 S:6 D:3 BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20 OM1 affair ends: May '20 W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20 W files for D: Jul20 OM2 confirmed: 9/2020 Divorced: May '21
Congratulations, kas! I don't blame you one bit for celebrating, considering the battle you faced. Best wishes for a bright, happy, peaceful future.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Congratulations! It has been a long and stressful ordeal for you and your family.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Now that the divorce sage is complete, what are your plans?
I still need to read this whole thread but you know I'm too busy celebrating. lol My divorce was finalized yesterday and I cannot wait to get rid of his name.
The first thing I'm doing is working on my appearance. I lost a lot of weight and have been wearing oversized clothes for years. I threw away most of my clothes when he left to avoid triggers and because I still thought I was fat I went out and thrifted clothes that were too big. I already did my hair for court but let it fade out to save money. I've made an appointment to get that redone.
I need jewelry, coats, shoes, everything. I look way way better now than when he left and I'm ready to rock it. I had a drs appointment last week and she commented about how much healthier I am now. I've maintained my weight for 6 months without dieting, stress eating, I don't even own a scale. My heart is above average now in health and I rarely get off the couch. lol I had NO idea how sick he was making me until he was gone.
I'm headed today to meet with an animal shelter about fostering kittens. I did it for a while but quit when court dates started piling up and I got depressed. I bought a sewing machine 2 years ago but again depressed. I'm motivated to do that and I want to exercise now.
Part of me wants to go out on a casual date for funnsies and to eliminate this lack mentality but I'm tabling that idea for now. I have no doubt that I could find someone better than my exH. If they treat me like a human then that's better than I've had for 30 years. lol
Well this turned into a book but I'm just so happy!!! I got to get my own car insurance today and thought that was FUN. lol
TLDR: I want to work on my appearance, pick up a few hobbies and live each day to the fullest.
