I think the universe has a way of teaching us lessons over and over again until we we've mastered ourselves.
In my case, I got back with my ex several times. And like clockwork, each time she burned me. It was a lesson I had to learn, and the universe kept presenting me with the same challenge over and over again until I decided to do something different.
One thing I've learned is that my best thinking is what got me into my mess. And it wasn't until I truly surrendered to the fact that maybe some of the fine folks on this board had ideas that were better than mine, that I began to grow and experience life in a new light.
I have ZERO problem with that.
Except that I was already saying over and over ---- I'm NOT pursuing pilot anymore. I'm done. I'm processing my feelings which are mine and valid for me but I'm 100% aware that I will not be chasing this man.
Yet.... pages and pages later all I get is how I'm still stuck and and I've never changed and how I'm going after toxic men. Its like none of them took the time to see that YES, I was hurt by pilot... but I'm done. You don't need to keep flogging a dead horse.
Same with my XH. I already said the reasons I needed to detox several pages ago. Yes, I have deal with. The fact that I can put those things out here is healing. You realize when someone is emotionally abused being able finally bring those things to light, accept them and not feel shamed by them is a HUGE step.
Yet... I'm still being flogged yet again for my toxic choices in men... but if you had really read my thread you would see I'm putting plenty of space between myself and my XH. I want my peace... I want 90 days of freedom from him. At a minimum at least 30. We still have business items but I'm not initiating and if he contacts me I will not be responding to texts like "this atty is dumb butt", "I can't believe its taking this long". I am only repsonding if he states "paperwork is all done, it just needs our notarized signatures".
I don't need to be continually flogged.
Sure, I gave LH an update when it happened that both pilot and my XH showed back up. Turned out neither is really at a point of healthy relationship.... I'm not pursuing either one right now.
^^^Seems like people are picking what they choose to read/respond to. It has nothing with me not being open to peoples suggestions. I'm already choosing not to pursue either.
