Good Morning, Well, made it through another day. Didn't make dinner with family, ended up having to take more pain pills, plus have no appetite. One of my girlfriends might stop by later today, which would be good, just feeling very lonely with being cooped up healing. Patiences is not my strong point, something I really need to work on.
This weekend is the superbowl, H and I have been hosting a party for the last 21 years for Superbowl. Designed our basement with a large bar and multiple TVs. This was always H's favoriote day of the year. He always said it was a way to keep in touch with all of our friends over the years, friends that we would only see for this party. Found out, from a friend, last night that he is having it at the bowling alley right down the road. She asked me if I was going to show up, I told her no that would not be a good idea. She said that she has no desire to go but her H is making her. She wants nothing to do with H & OW, told her I don't blame you. What they are doing is disgusting.
It really hurts to see that H is just acting like she is his new W. That he just removed me and replaced me with that monster. Doing all the things with her that he did with me. Not sure how our friends can eve be part of that. But then again, he tells everyone that he just wasn't happy with me. That I was the problem, some buy it some don't. It hurts to watch someone else try to live my life. She will never be me, the R that they have will not be respected.
Do the MLCers ever stop, in moments like this, and ever think about the life they had? Any moments of clarity? Like a what am I doing, moment? We had so many good memories from our Super bowl parties. One year we built a bowling lane out of ice in the yard and had a ice bowl tourny. God that was a fun day.
