Steve don't flatter yourself. You are not stalkable to me. We would never hang in the same circles as were are completely different people.

So "My boundary is a PA. Everyone is different maybe it isn't a boundary for you" Vs "I don't how you LBS spouses don't have a PA as a boundary. One is a strong conviction and one is a judgment. When you never knowingly walked in the shoes of KNOWING you W had an affair and being a LBS. Again I think it's 50/50 at best your W hasn't had a PA. Normal marriages are 80/20 and throw in you were a self proclaimed prick and your W is a SAHM who has crossed many lines at best she's at 50/50. Like I tell CW when he brags about being a WS. Know your audience.

"Reconciling is harder then divorce". Another claim you made without ever walking in the shoes of a divorced LBS. I'll find it if I have to. R2C knows I have a uncanning ability to remember situations and what was said. I have no doubt reconciling with someone who has betrayed you is difficult. Everyday not knowing if the next shoe is going to drop. But again you never had the feeling of a lonely house the first weekend your kids are away from you.

"When I signoff on LBS dating it is not to get into a relationship right away" You have no idea what dating after divorce is like. You have no idea (allegedly) what dating while having sex is like. You have no idea how women and men typically don't want you sleeping with multiple people while sleeping with them.

"Alcohol is evil and and you should check yourself into AA" Steve I get that you were an alcoholic and I think it is great that you have been sober for X amount of years. People love alcohol! Some days I sit on the beach listening to good tunes and drink 20 beers and fuching love it. Some people can handle it and some people can't. It's up to them to decide.

Steve 90% of your advice is good stuff and your prospective being someone who saved their marriage is a good one have on this board. Staying in your lane and preaching to other people is your challenge. Especially because there is so much hypocrisy involved.

Lastly yes we hijacked Bent's thread who is now a season vet around here. It would have been different IMO if it was a newbie.

You may not even get this because I think you indicated you took your ball and went home. If not feel free to respond. It's all good Steve.