I have actually initiated the first date many times. I have already said “ I’m really looking forward to meeting you”. I just don’t want to do anymore than that. When abs if he is ready, he knows I’m interested in meeting him. He will pull the trigger or he won’t.
I have been for quick meetings thinking that is the best. But I also realize I haven’t connected with any of these guys prior so there wasn’t anything to feed off of when we met and it was nearly totally blind. I think it’s better to build a little something before hand.
I went out with a coworker last night who is in her late 50’s and single. She raised her 2 sons with barely any help from her ex husband. She has dated a lot. She had some relationships. But she is pretty single. And she is very active and attractive and fun . She puts herself out there all the time. She will dive out by herself every night , sit at the bar and have a drink. She confessed to me that at the end of the day it makes her sad that she doesn’t have the one she can count on. I completely feel her and I actually did become vulnerable with her. I realize it is hard for me to share my struggles with those who never lived them. It’s easier with someone who has.
I was off today and I didn’t want to be productive. I didn’t want to do anything. I took a huge nap in the middle of the day and it was glorious. I did end up going to Costco eventually and I didn’t even cook. I picked up chik fil A for her and cava for me . And I don’t regret it.
Tomorrow the counter people are coming to measure and give an estimate. School has been cancelled …grrrrr…… and we will both be home, but she’s with her dad this weekend. Im going to go shopping for my back splash, and get ready for a weekend if 10 hour days of work. Yay.
I gotta say, I like the way my paycheck looked today. But I just can’t sustain this for the long run
