Ok so I am going to be honest with you here. First and foremost it takes two to make a marriage work and right now she is not onboard and there is absolutely nothing you can do to change her mind right now.
You have been separated for a year and a half with no movement so I think you have to ask yourself how long can I wait on her.
Lastly, it sounds like you want kids and sacrificed that for her. That is a really big decision you need to think about. The could lead to major regrets down the road.
Really think about those things and we can help you with whatever direction you decide.
Thanks so much LH19. Yes, with the no kids thing it might be a blessing in disguise. But I really hate the thought of having to try to build a life with someone else from scratch and as others who have been through divorce, I'm sure they are with me in feeling robbed of the many years that could have been spent on someone who would actually have been faithful.
I'm definitely not going to wait on her any longer if she is not interested. But I do want to try one last time to snap her out of it, however that may be. If she shows an interest in actually working on the marriage, I can wait a bit longer. But none of the strategies in DB/DR are useful because of the current relationship dynamic. It would be different if we had any face to face contact, spent any time together, etc but we don't. If she wants a divorce, I am going to tell her to go file and it will be on her, even though its not what I want.
