I gotta say. I have certainly been in your position before. I have dreaded the kiss. But on paper the person didn’t even check all my boxes.
I do really think son is on to something . Your recent love interests I believe you knew weren’t going to be long term. You had the young unemployed dude ( Jack?) that moved in with you. You did always mention how you didn’t see the long term. You knew he wasn’t the one you would grow old with, but he was lots of fun and things were passionate. TDH came with his share of drama . The other ones you really liked were unattainable: very distant and avoidant.
Now you have a guy that seems ideal it might feel “boring”? Or maybe just scary. And that might just be causing you not to rush in and hold back a little. Which is totally normal.
I’m in the date 3 camp. Maybe something to up the romance a little . It just takes longer than 2 dates sometimes! Longer lasting is built. Usually things that spark up fizzle fast.
Thanks everyone. Lots to ponder. I do think it is me but I don’t think I’m scared of finding someone who is my equal. And I don’t run from people who are really into me. Both Jack and TDH were really into me and both of them I thought, at one point, could have worked so I gave it a shot. But over time, Jack’s age and lack of direction became deal breakers for me and TDH’s issues revealed themselves and proved to be deal breakers as well. I know myself fairly well and the fact that I don’t have any romantic feelings for him are, at this point, a bit of a warning sign. I do, however, want to give it a chance but I’m worried that if I am feeling the pressure to kiss him at the end of the next date and I’m not feeling it, it’s going to make it hard for me to enjoy myself and give it a chance.
Fate may have intervened somewhat. I didn’t expect him to ask me out for this weekend because I’m pretty sure he has his kids but he texted me yesterday to see if I wanted to go snowshoeing on Saturday. I told him I would take a rain cheque. My sister and I are heading out of town on Saturday so I can go test drive an ID.4 (have a deposit on one currently but am still on the top of the wait list) and do some shopping. Also, both she and I started having CV19 symptoms yesterday and I am home sick today. We are going to do a rapid test today or tomorrow to see if that’s what it is and if it is, I won’t be going anywhere this weekend at all. Anyway, I let him know and he was very nice about it…said we would find another day.
So, I do think I will go out with him again and give it a chance but I’m pretty sure if I’m still not feeling anything (don’t need fireworks…just a tiny spark), I probably won’t go on a fourth date.
KML - I have a similar story. He is someone I’ve known forever and was my best guy friend growing up. We lost touch for a lot of years but recently have reconnected. He has been in a long term relationship and just asked his gf to marry him. The last time he and I hung out together, I went to his parents’ place for dinner with him as he was visiting them (he and his gf lived in a different town). He commented at the time that it was so easy to be around me and I agreed. It is rare to have that level of comfort with someone and I know there was and always has been a bit of a spark between us. Timing is everything however and it just never was there for us. I am really happy for him though. I have met his gf and I can tell she really loves him. A part of me will always wonder “what if” but maybe if we had gone there, it would not have lasted and we would not have had the lifelong friendship that we have enjoyed for all these years. At the end of the day, not every question can or should be answered.
Also, both she and I started having CV19 symptoms yesterday and I am home sick today. We are going to do a rapid test today or tomorrow to see if that’s what it is and if it is, I won’t be going anywhere this weekend at all.
A rapid test result that is positive is very reliable. But it will only be positive 80% of the time. With symptoms and a known exposure, if you get a negative test, you should repeat the test in 1-2 days or get a PCR test. And honestly, the odds that the two of you have something other than Covid in this situation are exceedingly small. Good thing you didn’t kiss the VP!
Thanks KML. Yeah…my daughter was negative the first time but positive the next day when he symptoms got worse. She started feeling sick on Wednesday and tested positive on Friday. So if I have the same timeline, tomorrow would be my time to test. I may still get a PCR if it’s negative just to be on the safe side. I’ve had three of those over the past three months and been negative every time even though I had symptoms that were pretty indicative of CV19. I wouldn’t care too much if it weren’t for my planned trip to Disneyland at the end of the month. I need a PCR test to return home and people can test positive long after an infection so I’m worried I would test positive and have to stay another week. We tested my daughter with a molecular test we had purchased for our return so now that she has that, she can travel at the end of the month and not have to test again. It would be ideal if my sister and I could do the same thing so I’m almost hoping I do test positive…assuming my symptoms continue to be relatively mild.
Definitely a good thing I didn’t kiss VP and I am thankful we were careful about keeping our masks on when we were in close proximity to one another.
My sister and I just tested for Covid. Her’s was negative and mine had a very faint line which, according to instructions, is positive. Joy. Ah well…don’t have to test for Disneyland now either. Guess that is a good thing. Two down…three to go. My sister is going to test again tomorrow. We have exactly the same symptoms so pretty sure she will be positive. Already cancelled all her appointments for the next five days to be on the safe side.
Thanks B. So far it’s just like a really crappy cold. I’m actually a bit relieved I got it because now I won’t have to worry about getting it… at least not to the extent that I did before.
So far it’s just like a really crappy cold. I’m actually a bit relieved I got it because now I won’t have to worry about getting it… at least not to the extent that I did before.
EXACTLY!!!!! And bravo for admitting that. This is what many of us have been trying to say for a long time now. Yes there are the 1% who have a really dire response and a few more percent that get really sick but for every one of those there are 40 or 50 who have the expierence you are having. And especially if you’re vaccinated, it really is nothing more than a crappy cold - certainly not worth giving up a year or more of your life trying to avoid - especially since you can’t avoid it forever. You may just be delaying the inevitable. Sooner or later everyone is going to get it. I’m hearing of more and more people getting it for the second time already.
How’s the saying go, all we have to fear is fear itself. Before vaccines the fear was more warranted. With, unless above 65 or with significant comorbidities, or just really bad luck, the odds for a full recovery are very much in your favor and on your side.
So glad you have arrived at that place. Oh and let me add, you’ll now have far greater immunity than you previously did - at least for awhile. Hope you’re back to normal soon!
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
I’m not sure what you think I admitted or what place I have arrived at. It is a crappy cold because I got vaccinated. In my province, 93% of adults are vaccinated and our hospitals are still being stretched to the max. The ICU’s are disproportionately filled with people who are unvaccinated. They get sicker and they stay longer and many do not leave at all. The people who do go home have a long road ahead of them. It takes many an enormous amount of therapy to recover. Some have so much nerve damage in their extremities that they can’t even walk or feed themselves. They have months and months of rehab just to be able to leave the hospital and then many more months of outpatient therapy after that. This is not a crappy cold for a lot of people. If everyone who got it had my experience, we would not have to worry about it at all. But…1% of people don’t (the numbers in my area are actually 5% lately). One per cent of almost everyone is still a h3ll of a lot of people and it is why our medical systems are stretched to the max and beyond. The restrictions aimed at slowing the spread are important because they hopefully prevent the 1% from needing care all at the same time. That’s the point of it. Not to stop it. No one thinks that is possible anymore.
Also… if it is you or someone you love who needs hospitalization or ends up in the ICU, the odds don’t mean anything. I know of at least two people in their 30’s who had no underlying health issues and whose kids no longer have a mother and a father. Neither of these people got vaccinated because they didn’t think they would be in the 1%. They were wrong and their kids are paying the price for it.
Yes Don - this just makes the case for those vaccine mandates you so hate. Also, I’m hopeful it won’t happen as much, but we don’t know yet whether breakthrough Omicron cases will trigger Long Covid.
DV, glad you’re having a mild case. Has your son gotten any symptoms yet, or just you and your daughter so far?
