Ginger, thank you for sharing your story from your past. This must have been an extremely difficult situation with your Mother and I'm really sorry for that.
My path was different. I had a loving, caring Husband and a great R for 16Y and he suddenly became a different person (you can call it MLC an/or mental illness,...), and I'll be honest, it is not always easy to see all this torment within a person and simply let them go, but I know I have to again.
I'll definitely take your word seriously and it is also because of my 3 boys that I can again no longer tolerate his presence while he is in deep MLC. I had to ask him to leave several times in the past and I will do so again, and I'll go even a little further now. When the house is sold I don't have to allow him anymore in the new house because then I'll have my own place, I'll only need to figure out what I will do in the coming months, before everything is arranged.
You are also right to say that I need to stop from letting him return when I do not see a direct path towards his healing process, and his healing will have to involve therapy which is still not the case at the moment.
I truly believed that this time (please do not consider my R in this case, as this is not my priority) he was on his way out of the tunnel and I still believe he was. Therefore I think the past weeks he's been home have been very important in his process. But unfortunately the past week bad situations took the upperhand again which shouldn't have.
I will not say I have made all the right decisions, nor I will say that I will do so in the future, but I'll do the utmost to protect myself and my children, I have always done that and will always put that first.
Once again, thank you for your honesty and caring Ginger.
