(((Elbereth))). I can so relate to what you said about the invalidating response of your family. As terrible as it is to think about, I used to think that it would have been less painful if my H had died instead of abandoning me for someone else. That is a very different kind of pain…when someone you love chooses to leave you as opposed to being taken away from you by circumstances beyond anyone’s control.
And people react to it very differently. When your significant other takes advantage of your love and trust, lies to you, cheats on you, and ultimately leaves you, most people see that as a good thing. Good riddance to bad rubbish. I can’t say that my family and friends didn’t support me because they did…but it was a different kind of support. There was an underlying impatience that basically said “you are better of without him so why are you STILL sad about this.” I think that is why I spent so much time posting on here instead of seeking out the support of my friends IRL. The people on here knew what I was going through and understood just how painful and life altering it is.
I think it is very normal to feel overwhelmed in dealing with everything…particularly at this time. It doesn’t make you weak or whiny…it makes you human. As long as you keep moving forward, even if it is at a snail’s pace, you are still moving forward. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Just keep taking bites Elbereth…you will get there. A year from now, you will look back on this and be amazed at how far you’ve come. And a year after that, even more so. It just takes time.
Re: the settlement. Don’t waste one second worrying about how he is going to react. You take care of you. Accept what’s fair and nothing less than that. You can do this my friend!!! (((HUGS)))
