Verbally Abusive

[SteveLW]

You go out and get a life. The LBSs that struggle the most do GAL the worst. The opposite of GAL is sitting at home and stewing in your own juices. That's a terrible way to move forward with your life.

Look, is to be sad. The emotional rollercoaster is real, and suppressing your feelings isn't advisable. Feel your emotions, process them. But don't let them rule over you. Cry. Be angry. Be frustrated. Then go out and GAL. The busier you stay the better you will feel, and the quicker you'll feel better

When he starts R talks, listen and validate. Read the validation thread. But be the one to end the conversation. "We are going to have to talk about the later, I have some where I have to be." Never tell him where you are going or what you're doing. Feel free to be a little mysterious. But find things to do and people to do them with.

And as far as marriage counseling, your WAH is right, it wouldn't have worked because his heart wasn't in it. I wouldn't dwell on that anymore.

Cathy, you can handle this. You're stronger than you think you are. Start prioritizing yourself. It takes two to make a marriage, only one to make a divorce. So whether you want the divorce or not, you don't get to control that. So focus on what you can control. Yourself.