My Story P4...Acceptance of the MLC Madness

[LH19]

MLC H is full time back now. Not a lot of G noticeable anymore.

I am not so sure this alter ego G ever existed.

He is still not strong enough, so it will be better for everybody that he leaves to whatever his destination might be.

Agree 100%

I came to realize that MLC H doesn't want me but can't let me go.

This is typical of all WW spouses. They want a safe landing spot if everything goes south on them.

I on the other hand can let go of him, I do not need him anymore but I still want him. So we have kind of different expectations. LOL

Being unattached is a beautiful thing.

He is leaving for his week skiing this evening, and came in my room last night to cuddle, to sleep by my side, to tell me he will leave again afterwards to be with OW2 but he is not sure she still wants him.

I am really sorry you had to hear that from him.

A bit later that he will leave because he will travel around the world to work on himself etc. Mixed emotions like crazy.

Don't hold your breath.

But one thing is clear, he wants a way out again.

I think he's been clear with his ACTIONs he always wanted out.

I told him that I will not be there for him when he is going back to OW2. That much is clear.

Good for you!

Yet again he can't understand why I still want him, he said I have not been honest with him, that he sees I still have expectations, and that we had an agreement when he returned home about the fact that he would never choose me anymore and he thought I was on the same level.

He's right. That's why I asked the question about what you would do if you knew he wasn't coming back.

I thought I was but he is actually not completely wrong. The past 8 weeks we have done everything together and yes, this has drawn me back to him emotionally more than I suspected.

Expectations are the enemy in these situations. WWs love to cake eat.

I have the impression that he will work on himself now, with or without OW2.

Don't hold your breath.

Should I put boundaries on anything or simply let him go and see where it goes?

Boundaries are only good when you have consequences.

I'm still fine and dealing well with it. Will miss him but will also fade when he is gone.

With time and space you will continue to see things more clearly. You seem like an awesome woman and deserve so much more. Be kind and patient with yourself.