HD, I find your wife's line of thought to be so wacky! She has this idea of what a "typical" man is and yet doesn't she realize that she is molding herself into the "typical" woman? Is this what she aspires to be?
Furthermore, I find her whole argument from the other day to be incongruent with the feminist ideology. For instance, men have forever tried to mold women into being more "palatable" to them, as opposed to accepting them for what they are. (by "men", I am of course utilizing a sweeping generalization which doesn't apply to all you wonderful SSM board fellas) Supposedly, they don't want women to work, to enjoy personal success, etc. They want them in a position that makes THEM feel comfortable--stuck at home with children, without the means or time to experience the world and perhaps find something better.
Which leads me back to your wife!! Here she is, treating you in the exact same way, Hairdog, and I just don't understand it. She asks you when you will stop "needing" sex and implies that this is something you will grow out of. In other words, she is trying to turn you into something that is more palatable to her. An emasculated man. Again, though, is this REALLY what she wants?
I just find her thinking process to be quite odd. As a woman, I can think of nothing more empowering than enjoying and pursuing sex for MYSELF. Not as a way to get or keep or please a man. I know that she is a feminist, but I believe that the focus on sexual dynamics as part of her feminist beliefs is nothing more than a way to keep da man down. lol Seriously, she is using this as a foolproof way to shut you up about it. I think the fact that you wouldn't give in while you were talking with her is excellent and I think you should even go further with this. All the while keeping up the no pressure campaign and being an all-around charming and lovable guy.
This will leave her alone with her ideology and she will soon see what she knows in her heart to be true--that sex a handful of times per year is not an acceptable way to run a marriage, regardless of whether you are a feminist or a chauvinist.
I hesitate to post my thoughts because I know it is a bit like the HD men posting on mine--I know that my thoughts can't be much help, as you and I are on the same side. You probably get more insight from the LD women who post here and I generally try to stay out of the fray and let them offer the advice.
But I just had to jump in here and say that no woman is going to desire an emasculated man.
Hang tough, buddy. You are doing great and really getting her wheels a spinnin'.
