Hairdog, I really think it's about time you turned the tables on her, and let her know exactly what YOU need, and what YOU will or won't put up with. So far SHE has all the power, and she is not doing good things with it. You need to set your OWN boundaries, and let her know that you expect them to be observed, and that YOU will be making choices based on the choices you see HER making. You will not progress with her until you do this. So far all you have is a power struggle, with HER on the "winning" side (which I put in quotes, since you BOTH lose with this arrangement).
