I'm sorry you're here, especially during the holiday season.
Originally Posted by WOS
The conversation was quite a surprise. H confirmed that he had retained a lawyer but said he had left it at that. According to him, he had done so to be prepared, not to file
So, he doesn't currently plan to file and you may have time.
Originally Posted by WOS
He also said he would never file without giving me a heads up first.
WAS frequently change their minds and yours lied about something "pretty big" (I'm curious and expecting a dating profile, dating, or affair--but won't pry). Thus, I assign little truth value to his promise not to file without telling you. Most WAS do drag their feet when it comes to filing so you probably do have some time to work this through before he acts.
Originally Posted by WOS
Obviously, we are not in a good place, but I felt some relief that, at least, I likely won't be served with papers any time soon. I still have my own consultation appointment with a lawyer scheduled for tomorrow and I think I might go ahead with it.
Don't rule out pulling the trigger on filing yourself. The filing does not end a relationship, and in many states, it grants you certain legal and financial protections if you're worried about custody, support, shared accounts and assets, etc.
Originally Posted by WOS
I'm also attempting to meet people virtually (for now). I've 'planted little seeds' in different places, which will hopefully lead to meeting new people and engaging in new activities. Overall, however, we're quite isolated :-(, something I'm working on.
Props for being the one to bring this up and working on making friends and building a wider network of acquaintances and support when you're losing a pillar in your life. This is a truly strong move!
