Another year in life of

[BL42]

Ginger1,

Oy vey. My New Year’s Eve will be spent with my daughter and my ex MIL.

Perhaps a New Year resolution to create boundaries related to ExH/OW/ExILs? It's great you're there for your daughter and show her everyone can get along, but it doesn't mean you have to cater to and spend time with them. It's OK to tell her "no" when it comes to ExH and his people, and let her spend time with them on their time.

Writing off people is easy when you don’t have to raise a child from scratch with them. If it was up to me, I would have never looked and spoken to him again and for my sake at that point in my life, I wish he left the both of us. But he only left me, which of course was best for D, but it was not best for me.

Very true. It's a long road with little ones.

Everything that happened the way it did was probably the worst for me, but the best for my D.

It's almost a paradox. What's best for us would be complete no contact with our Exs, but what's best for the kids is to see both parents get along. Of course we want above all what's best for the kids, but that's in conflict with our own hurts and healing. Hard situation for sure.

For me, I’ve been on the struggle bus since the day he left. Parenting a baby alone and working full time with no family help, switching jobs a million times because I had no help, watching my ex and his wife be a family , take my daughter on vacations, marry, stay together since day 1.

That's had to be difficult, especially at the beginning. I'd say I can't imagine, except...

Does it ever seem surreal? I'm sure a lot of you wanted ExH and OW to break up, at least for some time.

I admit, I am so ready for me time in this portion of my life. I’m so ready to make some life decisions based on what’s best for me. Like moving , career, etc. it’s all for my daughter now, but will absolutely be for me when she graduates.
I need this so so bad .

That's completely understandable. You've given so much to your daughter. It's fair to look forward to some "you" time as well.