the fact is, I really don't want to do this anymore. I'm tired of just trying to be happy with him and knowing that I'm not. I'm tired of trying to convince myself and everyone around me that I'm ok with him just working all the time and being a good h by being a good financial provider. I'm tired of making exuses for him and taking the blame for every little thing that goes wrong. I'm not the one who walked out on this m, I not the one who later admitted to not having been a true participant in the m to begin with, I'm not the one who had an a, I'm not the one who takes such a laze' fair attitude toward marriage..but I'm no longer the one who wants to be here.
I'm tired and honestly don't want to try anymore. If I could just pack my bags and dissapear I would! truth is I think h feels the same way. So what then? what do you do when both sides of the relationship just don't have anything left to give it anymore? end up one of those misserable couples that live as roomates just for the benifit of the kids? that's not what I want to be but I also don't want to hurt my kids.
