MLC- thank you for taking the time and explaining that. It absolutely all makes sense. I’m all honesty, all these dates and I wasn’t all that invested in any. I wasn’t feeling much of anything with anyone . One guy , we were literally just having fun because he was in no place to date, we always had a good time together, but 2 months and not bothering to hang out? I told him that wasn’t working for me and he said he didn’t want to end the connection. Gave him another chance. He didn’t pull through, I ended it, he still didn’t want to end it, but he also still didn’t want to put effort forth. I was done.
I luckily haven’t invested in any of them. The one guy who is into me, well, we didn’t get to see eachother much he worked like every night and when you sleep every day there isn’t much communication. I couldn’t get close to him. No idea why he felt so connected to me, but I didn’t have it for him.
I’ve weeded a lot out early on. Due to their inappropriateness . I really just need a break from it. I get it from every OLD platform. It’s making me sick to my stomach, actually. And angry. Just angry. And I think that’s why I was sad when the last guy changed his mind at the last minute about our second date. It was nice to talk to someone who was appropriate .
I need a break. The thought of dating right now makes my stomach turn. The thought of trying to engage with another guy who goes sexual on me before we meet just angers me. It’s just not rolling off my back now.
I will, however not invest with anyone early on , or over invest in someone again. I will not place high expectations on effort, but if there is none, I will just walk away. I’m going to go with my gut. I’m going to get out of my own way and my own head and keep it simple when I do decide to date again.
Just can’t do it now. I just want to put my energy where there is a fruitful return right now that makes me feel good. And that’s in myself family and friends .
