Another day in the life of

[MLCxH]

When it comes to convo, having a normal exH ache about work, life kids, hobbies, etc. that might happen for a day and then out of left field comes the sexual stuff.

This is unfortunate but the silver lining is that you can screen these guys out before you waste time on an actual date

Actually, on the contrary, I’ve been told I date “below “ my league. Looks and career wise ( I don’t believe in leagues, generally, I believe in people as individuals)

Did you feel the guys you swept right on but then found you were not attracted to, were below your league or was it just the opinion of others? If it is the former you may want have some reevaluation to do

I am definitely attracted to guys with drive, self confidence but not cockiness, ( I hate big egos) someone funny and and empathetic and strong yet vulnerable.

You may want to analyze which of these areas the guys that were interested in you but you were not attracted to, fell short. That may give you some insight on where the disconnect is.

As far as me, I have a confidence, not a cockiness, I don’t water myself down anymore like I used to. I used diminish the good in myself. I accept compliments now and thank people for them. I am , not as vulnerable as I used to be.

This is good. It is important to have confidence and not lower your standards on potential dates.

I feel like I haven’t been in an equal headspace with anyone. I feel disconnected I guess.

Unfortunately finding the right person at this age can be a challenge. Most of the good ones are taken and unavailable. In the small pool of people left that are decent human beings without any major issues, things like mutual compatibility, mutual attraction, mutual priorities, geographical location etc all have to align.

Perhaps the trick is to focus on the journey and not the destination - enjoy the dating process without overthinking it and your odds of finding 'the one' are likely to improve. DB is not the only counter intuitive thing that works in life