Good advice from both R2C & ovrrnbw. If she ever reach out to meet, I will keep this in mind. I've read over both your situations. I find it so interesting to read all the advice that is offered to all, often dating back many years. I'm trying to take in the advice and learning so much from all the reading.
Since last week, STBXW has indeed reached out a bit. Once at school to ask advice about her new pay scale. Although I have asked her to respect boundaries, it was very much a school matter so I treated the conversation as a professional. I must admit, at one point, I did jokingly ask her if I stank of alcohol. A dig? Maybe, but it was done in a very jovial way. That part wasn't very professional, but she did laugh.
She also texted to offer money for a cat bill. Poor thing had an ingrown nail. The cat, not the STBXW. He's 18 and been around longer than she has. I thanked her for the offer, but I don't mind covering it. At least there has been some communication.
Now the weekend approaching will have all kinds of triggers which I need to avoid. We have the school staff Christmas party this coming Saturday. STBXW and I got together at the Christmas party 15 years ago - it's kind of an anniversary for us each year we go. I couldn't stand being there while not being with her and not leaving with her, so I've decided it's best not to attend. It will be first time, and I LOVE a good party. Instead I've got tickets for what seems like a fabulous modern dance production, so I'm sure I'll have fun instead. Well, I'll try.
We used to have a photo on the fridge of "that night" 15 years ago that someone had taken, just before she seduced me. I put the photo away soon after she left. I wanted to see it tonight, and it's not where I put it. Probably for the best, eh.
Am I letting go? I think I am. I'm trying to keep my PMA and GALing, and leaving to her journey. God, it's hard, though. Patience. Let her go. Patience. Let her go. Patience. Let her go.
