When H is away, I experience relative silence from him and it is blissful. But when he is in town (often it starts with emails on the airplane when he is heading home) I have to brace myself for every interaction.
Hi Sage,
I can only compare with my situation and I had the exact same issues. H lives abroad since more than 1 year and only returned about a week every 6 weeks. while away sporadically controlling messages, mostly about the kids, once heading home, on the plane, this always increased. And everything is your fault, you keeping him out of the loop,...nothing new here.
Your children are smaller than mine so I can imagine it is really hard to do everything on your own. Definitely when you don't have any help of parents or other relatives. Would be good to try to find a possibility to plan a weekend off in the coming months, and perhaps go somewhere with a friend?
The positive thing however is their unconditional love for you and the fact that you are the one who has always been there for them. Believe me, they will never forget and will show this more and more as they grow older.
Good for you to never have complained or made him feel bad about the fact that you are raising them alone. I'm doing the same, so his fighting and emotional blackmail means nothing, it is because his fantasy world is not at all what he expected and he is mad about it.
Unfortunately this is all part of the process he must go through.
I'm glad to hear the kids are doing well.
I can only add that you are doing really well Sage. I don't think there is a better way to navigate through this unfortunately. The only advice I would like to give you is to try to plan some me-time for you as well. I know it is not easy but this is very important, even if it's only a weekend away. Time to charge your batteries a bit I guess,
