Wolfman moving forward2

[Wolfman]

I may be way off base here, but I had and survived 3 teenage daughters and this kind of stuff was typical for my girls at a certain age. One minute they would be saying they didn't eat breakfast so I was wasting my time cooking it for them and the next minute they were complaining I wasn't cooking them breakfast and they were "starving". Kids are kids are kids. Your situation is, of course, exacerbated by all the drama surrounding it, but you have to do your best to listen to what your D is saying to you and then validate it.

This is very true. I might be able to handle it better if my situation was a lot better. Not an excuse I am just mentally exhausted and spent. You are so right, I just want so bad for her to remember all the fun we had together. So, I try to get her to see that, but listening to all of you i see it's counterproductive with my approach. Honestly, I am so scared if I didn't defend myself that I would look like this monster in the therapists eyes.

You have to go into adult active listening mode, not defensive the world is against me mode. Think about it like this.....you have been saying parental alienation all along and have been fighting to get others to agree with you and see it that way. If that is, in fact, what is going on, can you step outside of yourself for a minute and see how that puts your d in a bad situation if her mother is manipulating her?

I think I said this last time, The therapist wrote a letter to my lawyer that she suspects parental alienation and she recommends forensic psychologist. That's the other thing that is really bothering me. Mom in brainwashing my d and it's taking forever to get forensics. Forensics will show alienation and then I can get the appropriate therapist for my daughter. There is a nationally renowned therapist 15 minutes away (who has wrote books about this and spoken around the nation) from me that I could get my daughter to go to, to get her the appropriate therapy.

LH thank you for those. I will definitely use those going forward. The one I did use was:

Another that she doesn’t want to talk to me on the phone all the time. Yet, she the. Complained when she took a cruise with her mom I didn’t call her on the cruise. Huh??

W: I am really sorry baby, I didn't want to disrupt your vacation.

I said something very similar. I didn't want to call because you were on vacation and didn't want you to worry about getting to a phone. I just wanted you to enjoy your vacation.