How are your kids handling all this? It's certainly tough on you, but make sure you're stepping up for them. Every two days is a lot of transitions. Your girls are young (2&4?), but you may want to adjust to less frequent exchanges over time? Read up on that - there are a lot of options.
I think you're right, W already mentioned this as well, I guess we'll look into other schedules soon.
Originally Posted by BL42
I don't recall you bringing up alcoholism or a car crash before? The focus seemed to be SSRIs, though you mentioned drinking with them. Is there a long history of alcoholism with her? Was the crash related to drinking?
No history of alcoholism, she always drank occasionally and pushed it once in a while on the odd night out or special occasion, but never regularly and never this amount. Yes, crash was a couple hours after a liquid lunch with coworkers.
Originally Posted by BL42
My suggestion, as everyone else has said, is...do. not. nest. Simply tell her you've decided not to move out. You're acting out of fear right now, but it's unlikely she'll move back into the house because of your decision...it's more likely she'll continue to stay at her parents or find some other arrangement. Stand up and be strong for yourself.
I like your stance here, I'm gonna go with this approach. Thank you!
Originally Posted by BL42
You're married. Emotionally you want to connect because your W is leaving and you're scared you won't meet someone else, or want revenge on your W, or have a need to feel validated by another woman, but...if you want to have any chance of staying married, don't have an emotional and/or physical affair with your x-GF.
I'll be straight up, although the D-bomb was a little over 2 months ago, I've been living with a stranger for the past 12 months, the person I had a past, kids and dreams with is gone, replaced by a hyper and self centered creature. I've been lonely a long time, I feel I've already come to terms with having lost my wife, perhaps and hopefully only until she stops with the medication and alcohol. So ya, I'm lonely, I miss having company, affection, real conversation and plans.
I realize it'll probably take years for anything to change with my W, she isn't going back on her decision any time soon. She's all in, high on life (and medication) and loving it.
