For now Mac I would table the things you need from her and focus on you and the kids.
You want to give her as much space as possible right now.
That is one of her main complaints that I don't do that. I can't tell if it's a 180 to do that or not.
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Journaling....
Well it happened. She left last night to go to her new apt. it was not unexpected but it was difficult. She initially only brought enough clothes for a few days while we figure out logistics. Normally, I'd try to read into this...but not this time.
We had a small talk before she left. She said this was very hard on her. I said that I understand that it must be really hard to feel like you have to make that decision. She reiterated that she loved me and though this would help a lot. I didn't agree or disagree just basically said that I want the best outcome(I don't know if this was the right thing to say)
There was no begging, no pleading. I was very calm and collected. But it stung like a B.
I really wanted to text her later in the night but resisted and she didn't reach out to me. So it begins.
I didn't sleep well and my mind raced. I felt like all the worst stuff was happening. Like she immediately hooked up with some rando.
She wants me to come over to see the place tonight. I don't know how I feel about that.
It [censored] because I want to try to stay positive, but everyone says don't focus on that. Instead focus on yourself. I can only distract myself so much.
