It is a learned skill. Just make it a goal and practice. Body language, eye contact, facial expressions, vocal tones and inflections skills can all be practiced at the same time as well.
Practice while standing in line for a coffee. One good way is looking around and identifying something unique or interesting. It can be as simple as "Those muffins look good....have you tried them?" Or "Those muffins are huge!"
With the staff, they typically ask my name to write on the coffee cup...I ask their name. The next day, I address them by their name....they typically are shocked. They then ask me my name...I tease them.."I told you yesterday"....twinkle in my eye....at some point I remind them...From that point on, they call me by name.
Don't make it complicated. Most of the time I make the conversation all about them. It is their story and I want to know their beliefs. I can listen to their political views. They can be left or right. I don't argue. I don't recommend politics for small talk, but hopefully you get the idea.
You can typically put people into "talker" or "listener" category. Small talk is much easier with your opposite. If you interact with your similar type, you need to shift to the other tye.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
