Thanks ladies. The boys so far have been doing well. But Halloween night S2 got upset and said he wanted us to all spend holidays together as a family. I explained that being “together” physically doesn’t not mean that we are actually “together”. The idea of family is different now, and I can live authentically, which is very important to my well-being. And my well-being translates to the well-being of them.
Anyone else watched “maid” on Netflix lately? I strangely find a connection to the story. The feeling of being stuck in a unhealthy relationship, not being able to distinguish the kind of love that I was receiving vs the kind of love I deserved…I’ve been trying to dig through my memory to find all the signs along the way that show that I should have left a long time ago.
I read “untamed” recently also.
And things are starting to click. What I was experiencing in my marriage was that I pushed my needs so far behind everyone else’s - and I thought that was the right thing to do. There were many times were I felt like things are not supposed to be this way, but I talked myself into thinking I should be grateful for what I have.
It is quite scary, looking back and seeing how long I put up with this. And scarier to think that if it wasn’t for exH’s bomb drop, I would have probably still be in the same situation now.
