I believe I mentioned the text my STBEx sent me three weeks ago about the "rumors" of her and one of my neighbors. Well, last week my STBEx sent me a spreadsheet of 500+ rows of all the money I owed her going back to 1/1/2021. There were charges of $4 and $10 at amazon and Target as well as larger ones. We agreed that I would pay 70% and she would pay 30% of kids expenses related to school and healthcare. Well she sent all the bills and then some over. Recognize that we are 50/50 custody, and that she works making over $140k per year. She also fought for child support in the settlement and spousal support which comes to over $3k per month and I owe her money, because I had to buy my business of $6k per month. So she is not hurting by any stretch.
And I buy the kids things and haven't sent her a receipt. Shoes, snowboards, ski passes, clothes, etc.
So the 500 rows and charges that are as low as $4 really bothered me. It made me wonder what our marriage was about. She seems to be coming after all the money - literally nickels and dimes.
So I text the woman who was mentioned by my wife in the rumors she said she would be glad to talk with me. Both her and her husband came over to my house.
He apologized for inappropriate behavior. He hid his relationship with my wife; sounds like another EA, and I don't think it went beyond that. They have now been in marriage counseling since she found out last year. Of course I was used to my STBEx hiding things from me and I knew she was too emotionally involved with this guy, but I guess it went on about a year longer than I was really aware.
Anyhow, my STBEx had him put my gun in his gun safe when she took it out of our house at some point. And this past September she wanted it back, but he had blocked her on his phone. So she texted his wife and she didn't respond, because first she didn't know they had my gun and seconed her take was that it was mine and if they were going to give it to some they would give it to me.
So then my Ex got another neighbor woman involved to attempt to retrieve my gun (which had been a gift from her father). And when that didn't work she cornered the husband and threatened them via text saying "If you don't give me my F-ing shotgun I will be calling the police on you."
So my neighbors left it on their porch and told her to get it. Crazy stuff.
And then today I got all the documentation to sign and send off to the attorney's to file.
And when I got in this morning I had 7 emails from my ex. 3 of them related to expenses I owe her for now. And she's keeping a spreadsheet.
I'm spiraling a bit with all of this, which is why I came here to write.
The newly revealed EA is just par for the course. She was friends with the wife, never apologized, and doesn't seem to care at all who she hurts. So that is oddly validating for me. Also, my ex had told me that my uncomfortable feelings about the husband and my STBEx's relationship were BS and accused me of being a bad jealous husband.
I want this over with. But now, it feels like I'm going to be getting hit with nickel and dime expenses for the next 8 years until the kids turn 18. I just want this behind me. I want to move on. It all makes me feel sick.
This day will be behind me soon. It will probably be a bad week or so. I'll need to figure out how to get the ex off of my back with the expenses. And then there will probably be another couple bad days or weeks as we move through the dissolution process in the courts.
I'm so angry about all of it. Sorry for the long emotional venting post, I could probably go on for days.
